We've been cleaning out my dad's room lately. This is something that hasn't really occured for about six years. He's kept a lot of stuff, including a zip disc that I used to store all of my homework assignments on when I was eleven. I found this (preserved in its entirety) when searching through it.

readme when you are seventeen.txt

8/3/99

Dear Future Dan,

Just so you know, you created this letter when you were 11, so please don't look back at how primative this was. (You're probably reading this on a 3 billion megahertz computer!) I have a few questions for me:

1) Do you/I have a Dreamcast?
2) Has mom died?
3) Who is you're/my girlfriend (if any)?
4) Have you/I moved?
5) Has time travel been created yet?
6) Is Pokemon still a fad?
7) Are there aliens out there yet?
8) Is there Windows 01 as I/you suspect there will be?
9) How's Andrew doing?
10) How are Chris and Weston?
11)Is the future like the Back to the future trilogy?
12) Did you/I EVER get Baku Baku in the mail?
13) Am I/you rich and famous yet?
14) If Question #5 is true, why don't you travel back in time to 7:00 PM CDT on August third, 1999 Ad in you're house?

Now I'll describe where I am in time. Yesterday I went over to North Saint Paul and rode my bike (which I just learned how to ride) on the state trail.You are wearing an Old Navy Shirt, Old Navy Cargo pants, your armitron watch, and my glasses. I have a tatoo on your left wrist of a weird little dinosaur guy.

In timely response,

6/24/05

Dear Past Dan,

Don't be so self-conscious about what I could possibly think about your letter. I know you; you're a sweet kid; I'm not going to mock your thoughts about the future (this computer, incidentally, does not run at three billion megahertz; it only runs at 750. It's on the old side of things.) Regarding my questions for me:

1.) Do you/I have a Dreamcast?

Yes, actually. You'll get it for Christmas from dad, and it'll be amazing; don't sweat not getting it as much as you have been. It's only a freaking videogame system. Unfortunately, the console will pretty much fail in 2001 when it can't compete with the Playstation 2 and the Microsoft (yes, that's right--Microsoft) Xbox. Your silly goddamn videogame allegiances (I'm sorry I'm calling them silly, Dan, but geez) will shift towards Nintendo, but aside from an original Gameboy Advance (it's gonna be more powerful than a Super Nintendo), you won't buy another console. Videogames won't be that horribly interesting to you anymore.

2.) Has mom died?

Mom passed away on November 3, 1999.

3.) Who is you're [sic]/my girlfriend (if any)?

Right now, no girlfriend, Dan.

4.) Have you/I moved?

No. Your room looks totally different, though. It's blue! And dad might move soon after I graduate. Maybe.

5.) Has time travel been created yet?

Not that I'm aware of. The physics behind time travel are probably really really hard to figure out, much less exploit for common use. Not that you wouldn't know all of that, and I'm sorry if i'm just patronizing you (I know you hate that), but six years isn't that long of a time to expect such huge developments. At least in terms of time travel.

6.) Is Pokemon still a fad?

Kinda. It doesn't have nearly the same weight behind it as once before, but I think that the cartoon is still on, and Nintendo keeps coming out with new videogames and related merchandising. I would thusly assume that it has a fairly significant following.

7.) Are there aliens out there yet?

Well, Dan, you didn't phrase that question too well. Statistically, lifeforms comparable to our own have probably evolved somewhere. Chances are, this hasn't transpired within the past six years. I think what you really mean to ask is whether or not we've dealt with aliens or anything like that. I don't think we have. I'm sorry.

8.) Is there Windows 01 as I/you suspect there will be?

After Windows 98 came Windows 2000, Windows ME and Windows XP. So in a sense, sure. Did you really have to put the "as I/you suspect there will be" thing in? It makes you sound a little bit dorky.

9.) How's Andrew doing?

Andy seems to be doing fine. He has just graduated from Harvard, where he met Aidan, his current girlfriend. This summer, the three of us are probably going to go westward, and in the fall, the two of them are probably going to London. I'm not in a position to really know how much he's changed since 1999; he could probably inform you on that much better than I ever could.

10.) How are Chris and Weston?

I don't really know. They also seem to be doing fine. You're gonna drift apart, I think. Chris' hair was quite long for a while, and you've had several classes with him in high school, but you haven't really had any significant conversations with him. Weston you see even less nowadays. I don't think there are too many hard feelings either way. This kind of thing will happen.

11.) Is the future like the Back to the future trilogy?

Nah. Not that the future portrayed therein couldn't still happen, because they travel to 2015, not 2005. However, the 1980's themselves have become de rigueur. There's an idiot supply-side fundamentalist in the white house, and bands are citing the Cure as a major musical influence. Not that you'd know what either of those mean without research. I don't think Wikipedia has started yet.

12.) Did you/I EVER get Baku Baku in the mail?

No! You should write a letter to your past self saying that it's stupid to order it in the first place. They totally ripped you off.

13.) Am I/you rich and famous yet?

Nope. You wanted to be rich and famous? Why don't I remember that?

14.) If Question #5 is true, why don't you travel back in time to 7:00 PM CDT on August third, 1999 Ad in you're [sic] house?

Well, if the answer to question five were to be in the affirmative, I'd probably have no access to time travel anyway. It'd probably be under tight security and regulation, which is wise, because you really don't want random people messing around with time travel, right? I could send a letter to myself another six years down the road telling me to visit you at the time you suggested, but it'd probably be pretty futile, because the time will come, and you'll be in the living room, and nothing's gonna happen. I hate to let you down like that. This was a noble effort though! I'll try it myself.

Now I'll return the whole "where am I in time" thing. It's summer after junior year. This morning, I went to the Byerly's restaurant with Kathy, Richard, Dad, Andy and Aidan, where I had french toast. Sunny and Oscar (you don't know Oscar yet) came over later and discussed their recent trip to Sweden. Oscar fell on one of the escalators in the Nassjo train station, where I was just a few months ago. I found this letter you wrote on your zip disc, and figured it deserves an honest, decent response. I don't really know how to send it to you, so I'm posting it online, and maybe somebody can sympathize with this dilemma and give me a suggestion. Sometimes it's nice to have people sympathize with things like this. I'm sure you know that.

I'm glad you finally learned to ride your bike.